Allison Williams Recalls Kicking Boys ‘in the Balls’ with Wooden Clogs in the 4th Grade: ‘I Hope It Caused No Permanent Damage’

Allison Williams is issuing a blanket apology on behalf of her fourth-grade self.

During an appearance on the June 24 episode of The Kelly Clarkson Show, the Girls alum, 37, recounted a story about how she once found it “amusing” to kick her male classmates “in the balls” with wooden clogs.

Williams told host Kelly Clarkson she was reminiscing with her lifelong friends-turned-Landlines podcast co-hosts, Hope Kremer and Jaymie Oppenheim, about fashion items they wore when they were younger, when she recalled the pain-delivering footwear.

“It was designed to break your ankle, like, as efficiently as possible, and it had this thick wooden sole,” she recalled. “The thing I associate the most with it — and this is horrible, and this is a mea culpa — but in fourth grade, I found it amusing to see what happened to the boys in my grade when I kicked them in the balls with that shoe.”

Clarkson, clearly stunned, hilariously fired back, “Just curious, what happened?”

Williams said she found the boys’ reactions “fascinating” because it completely changed their demeanor.

“These boys in fourth grade, the number one thing as a boy — in my school, at least — was nothing fazes you, nothing’s happening, I have a hoodie and no one can see me and I’m not here,” she explained.

“When they got kicked in the balls, suddenly this version of them would emerge that was nauseous and crying,” she continued. “I was like, ‘Wow, this is a different side of you that I’m seeing.'”

Williams went on to describe how she tried to understand what about the kick made it so painful for the boys.

“I was like, ‘But is it real? How real is this feeling? I don’t have that. I don’t have what you have,” she added. “It was a couple of them, a couple of times, and every time I would be like, ‘Are you really in pain?’ And they’d be like, ‘Yes! I’m throwing up! This hurts!'”

Now looking back on the moment, Williams offered up an apology — and a warning.

“To all the boys I went to school with, I am so sorry,” she said to her former classmates. “I hope it caused no permanent damage.”

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Williams then turned into mom mode, thanking those fourth-grade boys for “informing what I now need as information for the mother of a boy who now possesses those.”

The M3GAN actress — who welcomed son Arlo, 3, with fiancé Alexander Dreymon in November 2021 — then issued a warning to anyone thinking of recreating her wooden clog experiment with her little guy.

“And to all the future people in Arlo’s life,” she cautioned, “if any of you kick him in the balls, I’m coming for you.”