7 Life Lessons Julia Child Taught Me While Writing The French Kitchen (Exclusive)

I stood in my kitchen with an apron tied around my waist, a chopping knife in hand, and enough hope to be dangerous with a Dutch oven … I was about to cook with Julia Child.

If research meant stepping into the shoes of the characters in my newest novel, The French Kitchen, I knew I’d have to learn to cook from the master herself. But as I watched Julia bake and braise on episodes of the classic TV series, The French Chef, a different lesson emerged. Julia Child may have taught a generation how to cook, but the wit and wisdom she shared from her kitchen could teach us so much more about how to truly live.

As we celebrate Julia Child’s birthday on Aug. 15, here are seven no-fail life lessons from Julia’s kitchen to ours, from her 2020 book, People Who Love to Eat Are Always the Best People.

Life Lesson No. 1: “I was 39 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate.”

The takeaway: Embrace the unexpected adventure of a new season.

It was summer, 2023. I was at a hotel — still healing weeks out from a bout with COVID — and decided to research a topic I’d heard about on a podcast. (How did I not know Julia Child had a “spy” backstory from WWII?!) Collapsing in a deck chair by the pool, I opened a book about Julia’s life and saw a photo of her cooking at a little stove in her Paris apartment in 1952. And that was it. Something sparked inside and I started furiously writing on my phone. Five minutes later, I sent a synopsis to my agent asking if there was something there. 

Her response: “Write it. This is your next book.”

Who’d have thought? One unexpected moment would usher in the next two-year season of my life, writing The French Kitchen.

Life Lesson No. 2: “I think every woman should have a blowtorch.”

The takeaway: Seize the moments that matter.

During the writing of The French Kitchen, I was diagnosed with a serious spine condition and realized my life was about to change in a big, scary way. Similar to Julia’s real-life backstory, I knew I wanted a main character who would embody the fierceness I wasn’t sure I had in facing my own journey.

Kat Harris emerged from Julia’s quote — a college-educated linguist, a runner, an auto mechanic who has a blowtorch (and isn’t afraid to use it), and a reluctant spy who later seizes the courage to find her brother who’s gone missing in France. Kat crosses paths with Julia in post-war Paris and finds something as simple as cooking helps her move forward, because she’s braver than even she knew.

Life Lesson No. 3: “No one is born a great cook, one learns by doing.”

The takeaway: If you value something, invest the time to learn it well.

Julia Child didn’t graduate from Le Cordon Bleu Paris in 1951 ready to conquer the culinary world. Instead, she spent dedicated time at that tiny stove in the photograph because of the sheer love of learning to cook. Writing The French Kitchen was no different. In order to teach the characters in this novel how to cook, Julia would have to first teach me. And with every meal I served my family, Julia’s dedication to her craft spoke volumes into my mine; we have to put in the time today if we want to grow tomorrow.

Life Lesson No. 4: “Learn to cook — try new recipes, learn from your mistakes, be fearless and above all have fun!”

The takeaway: Fearlessness is your superpower — wield it often.

I was an exhausted mom with three young kids, a demanding corporate job and time to write only on lunch breaks and long elevator rides. So to walk away from my first career to become an author didn’t feel fearless. In fact, I was sure it could be the biggest mistake of my life. 

But I took the novel I’d written on my phone while on maternity leave (because, when else does Mom have time?) and said, “I’m going to give this author dream everything I’ve got.” Somehow, fear didn’t seem so big after that. And the dream our family was chasing, not so far away. By the time I began writing The French Kitchen (my 11th novel), we were having fun. And fear had become a superpower I didn’t expect would help us keep going.

Life Lesson No. 5: “Serious artist or weekend amateur, it’s more fun cooking for company in company.”

The takeaway: Find your people and live, laugh and feast with them often.

If the first rule of cooking is fun and fearlessness in the kitchen, then the second rule must be to do it in company. In The French Kitchen, women come together in a similar way in a Paris cookery class, where each must untangle their own experiences from the war in order to rebuild their futures. As an introvert-author navigating her post-COVID work, this felt empowering. 

I had to get out of my comfort zone and get about the business of living in the world again. I signed up for local 5k races. I joined a book club where I knew no one. I hiked and attended a pottery class and volunteered for causes I cared about. And I realized it’s not the activities that are most healing — it’s the people you meet along the way.

Life Lesson No. 6: “How I love to come back to this sweet and natural France, this warmth, these wonderful smells, this graciousness and coziness and freedom of spirit.” 

The takeaway: Slow down. Make beautiful memories. Repeat.

Authors will tell you we’ll do just about anything for research. I’ve toured the haunted grounds of a former sanitarium, raised a bee-covered frame with bare hands and embarked on a research trip across Ireland with zero agenda and an outdated map.

So in writing The French Kitchen, it felt wonderful to slow down, to savor being in my own kitchen for hours at a time, taking instruction from Julia like she was my personal coach. What I didn’t expect? Every one of those experiences have been shared — with people I love and work I adore — and become stand-out chapters in my own story.

Life Lesson No. 7: “Find something you’re passionate about and keep tremendously interested in it.”

The takeaway: Passion isn’t passive; live life to the fullest.

The message of The French Kitchen is to chase after our passions with everything we’ve got. No doubt Julia would encourage us to keep cooking — perhaps even one day to learn to sauté in the French way? But more than that, the wisdom Julia shared can inspire us to look beyond what we think is possible. And as she famously bid farewell with a “Bon Appétit!” at the end of each episode of The French Chef, may we find our own delicious version of enjoying all life has to offer.

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