Gwyneth Paltrow ‘Ended’ Friendship with Madonna After This ‘Breaking Point,’ Claims New Book

When Gwyneth Paltrow was a high school student in the late 80’s at the posh Spence school on Manhattan’s Upper East Side, smoking was a favorite pastime for many of the students.

Her father, TV producer Bruce Paltrow, wanted her to quit. He asked a friend, director Leo Penn, if he could ask his son, Sean, to ask his new wife to write Gwyneth a note. 

That’s how Madonna ended up writing a note that read in short: 

Dear Gwyneth. Just to jot down my average day…I wake up, I don’t smoke…And I go home a happy, healthy me.

Love, Me, Madonna.

PS: Good girls live longer.

The two women developed a friendship as Gwyneth grew older and by the time the actress was living in London, with first husband Chris Martin, she and the singer were often seen together in workout clothes after a Tracey Anderson workout. 

According to a juicy new book, Gwyneth: The Biography, by Amy Odell, excerpted in this week’s PEOPLE, they later had a falling out.

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“Their relationship reached a breaking point when Madonna showed up to an island where Gwyneth and Martin were vacationing,” Odell — who interviewed over 220 people for the biography — writes in the book. “Madonna seemed to know that Gwyneth would be there, which Gwyneth seemed to find strange.”

“Madonna then insisted Gwyneth and Martin join her for a big group dinner at a long table where Madonna went off on her daughter, Lourdes,” the book continues. “Gwyneth and Martin were disgusted by the behavior. ‘I can’t be around this woman any more,’ Martin told Gwyneth. ‘She’s awful.’ Gwyneth agreed that Madonna was toxic and ended the friendship.”

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While neither of the women have spoken about the friendship fallout, Paltrow credited her former friend in 2008 for helping her navigate postpartum depression.

During an appearance on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Paltrow said Madonna urged her see the “bigger picture” amid her struggles. “You can measure somebody by their children ultimately, and these children are phenomenal… They’re very polite. They’re sweet, kind, conscientious,” the actress said of Madonna’s kids at the time.

Gwyneth: The Biography hits shelves on July 29 and is available now for preorder, wherever books are sold.