Kerry Washington Reflects on Seeking Treatment for Eating Disorder After Suicidal Thoughts

Kerry Washington recognized she was in the midst of a “real mental health crisis” before seeking treatment for an eating disorder.

“The thing that actually got me to get help with my eating disorder wasn’t the food itself, wasn’t the behavior with the food,” Washington, 49, said during her Wednesday, March 18, appearance on the “Call Her Daddy” podcast. “It was the suicidal ideation.”

Washington explained that she was “trying to escape life” at the height of her struggles.

“I was using food and exercise as a tool to not be here,” the actress explained. “I need to figure out how to be in life. I was terrified that I was being so mean to myself.”

Washington continued, “I was in so much pain that inflicting more pain was the only way out of my pain.”

The Scandal star previously spoke about her eating disorder struggles during an October 2020 interview with Essence, revealing her battle with binge eating.

“I used food as a way to cope. It was my best friend,” Washington said at the time, explaining that she would sometimes eat “until I passed out” and then “go to the gym and exercise for hours and hours and hours.”

During Wednesday’s “Call Her Daddy” podcast, Washington explained that she decided to seek treatment when things were “the worst” in college.

“It was the first thing that got me on my knees, ever. The first time I ever prayed was to get out of this insanity,” she recalled. “My entire life revolved around what I was eating or not eating, how many calories I was burning.”

Washington went to both group and individual therapy at the time. She also worked closely with a nutritionist.

“​​I think if you’re the one struggling, it’s trusting your gut,” she said. “If you know you need help, don’t let anybody tell you that it’s not a big deal.”

Washington — who invested in the online platform Equip, which helps with eating disorder recovery — explained that eating disorders are still difficult for doctors to diagnose.

“If you’re struggling, don’t minimize it,” she said. “If you need help, ask for help. You don’t need to suffer alone. You don’t need to live in pain. You don’t need to engage in activity that takes you out of life.”

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org. If you or someone you know struggles with an eating disorder, visit the National Alliance for Eating Disorders website or call their hotline at (866) 662-1235. Text “ALLIANCE” to 741741 for free, 24/7 support.