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Matt Willis says he and Emma turned to marriage counselling ‘due to his undiagnosed ADHD’

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9 months ago

July 21, 2024

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Matt Willis says he and Emma turned to marriage counselling ‘due to his undiagnosed ADHD’ – Mirror Online

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16:17, 21 Jul 2024
Updated16:21, 21 Jul 2024

Matt Willis has opened up about how marriage counselling with his wife Emma Willis due to “problems” in their relationship led to his unexpected diagnosis of adult ADHD.

The Busted star got candid about his condition on the latest instalment of his On The Mend podcast, where he was joined by his psychiatrist, Dr James Kustow.

Dr Kustow enlightened listeners about ADHD symptoms, stating: “I think the most simple way of understanding ADHD is to consider it as a disorder of regulation, because every symptom associated with ADHD can be explained in terms of regulation.”

He went on to describe his unique approach, saying, “I’ve developed a model called the 10 domains of dysregulation and each of them illustrate a different aspect of ADHD, and the first four; attention, activity, impulse control, and emotion, I call the core four. Those are the ones we see when we go on the internet and type in, ‘what is ADHD?’.”

Delving into the specifics of emotional dysregulation, Dr Kustow explained that it’s about “emotions that fluctuate within the normal range”, but with “lots of fluctuations within a day”, which can significantly disrupt daily life, reports the Express.

Furthermore, he discussed: “There’s this concept called rejection sensitivity dysphoria, which we can talk about in a moment, but I think it is so characteristic of the experience of you [Matt], and scores of other patients that I have, I think it’s a very useful concept.”

Matt opened up about the pivotal moment that led him to seek help, sharing with Dr James: “Do you know, that was the crux of me really coming to you, if I think about it, because the reason I came to see you was because I was in marriage counselling.”

He continued, revealing the impact of his undiagnosed condition on his relationship: “Me and my wife were in marriage counselling, we were going through some problems, which I now realise were all due to me having undiagnosed ADHD, and I wasn’t willing to admit that at the time.”

Reflecting on his initial resistance to further diagnosis, Matt said: “And when the counsellor we had said, ‘I want you to go and speak to someone, I think you might have something’, I was quite offended, if I’m honest. I was like, ‘don’t make this about me, this is about us! ‘, and my back was up.”

He then recounted the condition being mentioned in past experiences with addiction treatment: “I’ve been told in rehabs before about ADD and I put it to the back of my head because I just wanted to stop taking drugs, and I didn’t want to have to deal with anything else, so I kind of ignored it.”

Matt described the emotional turmoil that brought him to a realisation: “This moment that brought me there was the fact that I was taking something the wrong way in a rejection way. I was becoming so emotionally charged by something that wasn’t a rejection, but I saw it as [a rejection], and it affected me massively, and I reacted really badly to it.”

He concluded with a candid admission: “I couldn’t see that I was reacting badly to it because I felt rejected and hurt, and I felt like it was an attack.”

Matt confessed that his initial response to any issues in his marriage with Emma was to “catastrophise that this is the end of our relationship”, even when the problem at hand was “such a minor thing”.

Reflecting on the advice given by their therapist, Matt now sees things from a different perspective.

The Busted star elaborated: “Obviously, we were there [in marriage counselling] for other reasons as well – like me having parking fines, and speeding tickets, and driving bans, and not sending off letters, and always being late – these onslaught of ADHD symptoms.”

“I mean, now, when I think of when she said, ‘I want you to go and see someone,’ of course she would have said that! She’s a great therapist to have pointed that out to me, but at the time, I was really shocked.”

As per the NHS website, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a behavioural condition. It explains that individuals with ADHD may appear restless, struggle with concentration and act impulsively.

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Matt Willis says he and Emma turned to marriage counselling ‘due to his undiagnosed ADHD’

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Matt Willis says he and Emma turned to marriage counselling ‘due to his undiagnosed ADHD’

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